It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
