We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize