Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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