so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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