Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
