I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
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