I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
