dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize