I got chris browned last night
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize
