you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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