when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
