my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
