he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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