Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
