so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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