1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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