She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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