Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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