I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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