Midget sex pt 2 tonight
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize