What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
