You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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