I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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