The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
