break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Randomize
