I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize