Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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