Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Best friends brother. Beat that.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
