Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
