I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
