bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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