He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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