first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
