So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
