thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize