1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
pray to the hookup gods
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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