Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
