I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize