i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
