haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
