Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
