Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Randomize
