no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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