I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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