break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Randomize
