chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
