you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
