Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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