we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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