she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Randomize
